Today we were waiting in the long and crowded lines at Costco (see my previous blog entry for a glimpse into my personal feelings on this joint), when it came to my attention that Aliyah was trying to get the attention of someone behind me. She was crooning loudly in her cutest baby-talk voice and smiling sweetly-
"Hey little guy! Heeeeey little guuuuuy! What's your name little guy? Hey little guy!"
Her increasing volume and the sidelong glances from fellow customers finally made me peek over my shoulder at the object of her attention. I must have flushed scarlet when I realized that it was really too much to hope that she was not baby-talking the midget (aka little person) standing 5 feet behind me in line. I hurriedly blocked her view and explained that he was really a big person, but just short like Mommy (FYI: I am technically only 1/2 inch from being a legal midget) to which she loudly, oh so loudly argued "No Mom, he's LITTLE!" And arching around me, yelled to him "Hey little guy! You Big? Or you little?" At this point I simply prayed that the floor would open up and swallow us cart and all. I suddenly felt a strong kinship to Buddy's dad Walter on Elf. If the cashier hadn't saved me from the awkward silence that had fallen over our section of the checkout lines, and the desperately suppressed laughter on the faces of everyone around me, I think I might have burst out laughing myself, just for lack of any other intelligent response.
I'm happy to say that I made it all the way out to my car before letting go and laughing until I cried, with a very confused but happy Aliyah in the back seat. So now I have something new on my to-do list: Explain to my 3-year old how people come in different sizes, and why we don't draw attention to that in crowded places. Well, at least I can try, right?
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
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11 comments:
Oh no... I can just feel your awkward pain! I'm so impressed you were able to hold your laughter in until the car. Oh Aliyah... ;)
I LOVE stories like these! I think we all go through this at least once. Like my Belle... while waiting in line at Target she shouts, "Wow, Mom! That lady has a HUGE butt!" She actually did... but that was beside the point!:) I was horrified!!! I received a very disgusted look from the large-bottomed lady and felt the anger in her glare! It was horrible, but to this day is still one of my favorite stories! Good times! :)
Oh boy! How to you approach that subject or even think about teaching it to your kids until you've had this sort of situation. Poor guy!
this is hilarious! well, embarrassing at the moment, but hilarious. are you really only half an inch from being a midget? how tall are you?? i can't be that taller than you and im 5'3.
LOL you gotta love kids! One time we were in Walmart and Adelle put her hand on a guy's tattoo with a puzzled look. Kids
Right now Allie is asking me why I am crying. I am trying to explain to her that sometimes I laugh so hard that tears come out of my eyes!! This is one of the best stories I have ever heard. We love Aliyah. Let me know when you are up for another visit.
We feel your pain. Our second child goes says if you even bump into him gently, "you hurt me." Also not so good for the public place.
Yet another hilarious incident with Aliyah. I think you need a sitcom with all your brillant writing and your comedic daughter it is a perfect match don't you think?? I always look for a new post because it just makes me laugh out loud. You made my day and good luck with future embarrassments.. soooo funny
That is seriously the funniest thing I have heard in a long time - you just made my day!
I have tears in my eyes because I am laughing so hard. Awesome! Thanks for sharing!!
Wow. I would die! That is so funny! The way you tell it is awesome. Hope to see you guys soon!
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